Perhaps its cliché in this space, you be the judge: the best yardstick I have for myself is if I can stand up in the morning and look back at the person shaving in the mirror. If I can, I’m doing OK. Not that everything is great. Not that I don’t have things to work on. That look back at the person shaving in the mirror is my way of saying to myself go ahead and get into the day.
SUPPORT THE SINGLE DAD AND HELP STAMP OUT CHILDHOOD TUMORS. THE 2014 CUPID UNDIE RUN
Some days are better than others. I try to take a lesson out of the day and apply it going forward. The reality though is you really can only control the present – and be present in that moment. The past may or may not impact you, and the future is out of your reach. But in the moment, in the present is your sphere of control.
As the single parent of a teen and a pre-teen I try to give my girls appropriate space to make decisions and guide them to make the right choices. Case in point, 11.0 and I were going to a hockey game last night. I gave 13.5 the better part of the day to make a decision on how she would spend her evening. Yeah, it cost me a few hours of my Saturday, but to me that was a small price to pay to allow 13.5 the chance to make a choice.
11.0 gets her chance to make a choice that she will have to live with as well. There’s another hockey game tomorrow night. For a change, she does not have Hebrew school, so she can go. The trade-off though is she needs to get up Tuesday morning for school with no complaining. She’s up for it, and I’ll give her the chance.
I’m willing to make a sacrifice in time and effort to give the girls a chance to experience life on their terms. Hoping I’ve given them the right guidance to make the right choices. It’s a full-time job for me, but that’s what parenthood is, right?
So, there’s this guy looking back at me in the mirror each morning when I shave. Not such a bad guy. Maybe rough around the edges, but no need to look away when shaving.